Psychotherapist Mary Jo Rapini

The case for practicing healthy boundaries in your family.

Can you please tell me how to handle the workplace bully? After 22 years of marriage, how do I get my husband to start picking up his underwear from the bathroom floor?

Humans are reactive, and many times we take on other’s problems and make them ours. We react impulsively and insensitively to others because we pushed our own buttons long before anyone else did. Many arguments and conflict we engage in are of our own making.

How does a parent deal with the guilt of not being able to save their child from suicide or suicidal thoughts? How do you deal with a family member who has an alcoholic issue?

The only person who can “fix” you is you, and you do that by accepting where you’re at and making strides to change the behaviors holding you back. Your partner should believe in you and encourage you in your growth.

When you think you’ve found the right person, how do you date them successfully? How do I go about feeling less awkward or anxious attending parties or events alone while others are attending as couples?

Setting goals and celebrating your success together will lead to lasting positive changes in your relationship. 

The holidays are a stressful time. Sometimes what we need is a break, where there are no requirements or constraints. It can lower stress, improve sleep, reduce blood pressure and strengthen relationships.

How do you instill the deeper meaning of Christmas in your family so your children’s Christmas memories will be filled with joy instead of “material stuff?”

Question 1: This time of year, during the holidays, many of my friends are rushing into relationships. What are potential red flags we should look out for? Question 2: My brother had twins recently, and I really want to see them over the holidays, but they live with their mother and she and my brother aren’t on good terms right now. How can I ask to see the babies without making family matter awkward right now?

Not wanting to lie to your children but also not wanting to scare them, it’s important that parents be honest and gently explain when times are rough. Families struggle to restore their home, their health, and their finances when their children have holiday wish lists as big as the bills.