Dating your crush's friend, seeking help with grief

- Hi, Mary Jo.

I use to like this one boy, but we never went out. Now his friend is interested. Should I give it a try? 

Caroline

Caroline,

If you no longer have feelings for the guy you were originally interested in, I see no problem with going out with his friend if he’s someone you’re interested in getting to know better. 

Hi, Mary Jo.

I just lost my mom and am feeling the grief. How do you know when it’s time to seek professional help?

Eva

Dear Eva,

I am sorry for your loss. Many people feel as though you must hit a specific point or level of distress before seeking professional grief counseling, however that is not true. There are many reasons people feel more comfortable talking to a mental health expert about their loss. If you have any of these struggles, you would benefit greatly from counseling:

  • You need help sorting through your experience with your mom’s death.
  • You worry that friends and family are tired of listening to you talk about your sadness.
  • You lost your energy and feel as though someone has to hold you accountable. For example, you can’t get motivated to do things anymore.
  • You feel anxious and fearful or have many emotions going through your mind that you can no longer control.
  • You feel a loss of meaning or purpose.
  • You’re having problems dealing with your intimate relationships due to your loss.

Seeking help with a therapist is not a weakness. It’s a sign that you know yourself and are aware of your feelings. It demonstrates that you want guidance to help you move forward and to feel strong and confident again. A wonderful group shared organization that can help you is www.griefshare.org.

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